blah

I don't know what to say these days. There's a whole lot of things I want to say, but that I just don't feel like revealing. I come home, and the whole night my head is buzzing, but then I approach my computer and I just don't feel like sharing.

Even now, as I type I don't know what I'll write. I don't know what to say next. I think I'm feeling quite pessimistic. I'm happy, sort of, I always try to be happy, but I just don't like myself today. I didn't like myself yesterday either.

I'm not looking for sympathy, because I don't deserve it, nor do I need it. I don't know if I want it either, because then I just feel worse.

Do you ever wake up and just look at yourself thinking "what the hell am I doing with myself?"

Yeah, you probably have. I think everyone does at some point or another, it's human, I hope. I think. I'm sure.

You know what, I think I've written about this already a long while back.

The fact is, I know what's wrong, I'm just to slow to do anything about it. To slow, and truth be told, to lazy, and I know I'll pay for it. I'll pay for it dearly. That's how I feel. That's what I see.

I'm a hypocrit, and now you all know.

Goodnight and Take care.

~Pink Gerbera~

Hospital Gowns and a Need for Sleep

Today was a long day, and all I want to do is crawl in to bed and sleep.

I woke up at six, went for my run, got home got ready, and headed to the hospital where I started my first day as a unit aid.

It was, interesting to say the least. It’s a small rural hospital and all of the patients are elderly. So in the morning I went around and freshened up everyone’s cup with ice and water, tidied the rooms after discharge, stocked patient bathrooms, shredded papers, chatted with some of the patients, took some of them outside on the patio to enjoy the sunshine, passed out lunch trays, and gave out snacks. Then at three I got to start all over again as the new nurses came in for the evening rotation. Exciting, no?

It got a little boring at times as I finished my tasks all really fast but I still really liked it. It was nice.

I’m not allowed to do patient care seeing as I’m not an RN –plus I would probably end up killing someone- but I get to do all this other stuff, which i already noted above.

I don’t know, it’s nice to be in the hospital and get a feel for the place even though I’m not an RN yet.

Anyway I got done my eight hours then drove home, got dressed and headed to the restaurant where I worked the evening shift.

I just got home and have to write my resume and do laundry. I’m tired, and all I want to do is sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

Oh, and for the love of chocolate, why, WHY do I have to be sore today from running? I like the feeling but I’m telling you, when I was running this morning I was a dead weight.

Anyway, Alhamduillah. So much for enchanting update. Don't throw the tomatoes, I'm to tired to dodge them.

Take care.

~Pink Gerbera~

Booyaaa

FRANCE beat down BRAZIL!

If that's not occassion enough to celebrate what is?

France has a kick butt team, but naturally the motherland (Germany) will win.

All bets on Germany.

Ok, so no betting, you get what I mean.

Toodles

~Pink Gerbera~